The Dr is in the House. Or the Cage.

Dr. MadamA (aka Angelika for the uneducated) was in the House. Or the Cage. Depends on the Hour.

Sunday (29 March 2026) saw the MELD Jail n Bail and Cancer Awareness Fundraiser for Relay for Life in SL descend upon the MELD Campus, and I arrived the only way a self-respecting Dominatrix Doctor should: seated on a cushion, held aloft by balloons, cigar hanging from my lip, already plotting.

My RP medical credentials were impeccable. My intentions, considerably less so.

I took my post at “Dr. MadamA’s” Cheeky Clinic, where we provided consensual screenings, 1st life cancer screening talks, and ridiculous fun, in that order, sometimes simultaneously. While it all took place on an adult sim, and was considered an adult event, the exams were not set to be adult. The clinic tent had a BDSM wall rack for PG roleplay to accommodate consent-based “male” breast exams / awareness, the pillory for PG penile & testicular cancer checks / awareness, an examination table for PG “female” breast exams, and signage about breast and colon cancer (and ACS’s international resources) to make the whole deliciously adult affair genuinely educational. You are welcome, public health.

The warrants had been issued. The criminals were circling. I egged them on with the enthusiasm of a woman who had absolutely nothing to fear from the law. I was wrong about that.

Upon each jailbird being released, I performed my doctorly examinations with the gravity and thoroughness the role demanded.

Naturally, this caught the attention of one LuCat, who, on the basis of what I can only describe as completely fabricated accusations, had me unceremoniously arrested and deposited into some bamboo contraption that I am choosing to call a cage, because that is what it was.

Here is what I forgot: I had a bone saw. I had an actual bone saw, and I did not think to use it until I was already rattling the cage door, smoke curling from the cigar I had somehow maintained throughout my arrest, dignity surprisingly intact. A missed escape opportunity I will be reflecting on for some time.

I was eventually sprung by a kind soul who clearly recognized injustice when they saw it. The Bailiff Atti, who is the singular bane of my mayhem-flavored existence in Second Life, watched on with entirely too much satisfaction.

In between incarcerations, I prescribed pills. Bottled, rattling, completely without medical indication, absolutely not to be taken with water or seriousness. My medical assistants, Vyn, Vhiolent and Naomi kept the operation from fully dissolving into beautiful chaos, which was appreciated.

The public chat ran past me like it had a personal vendetta. I did my best. I failed magnificently.

DJ Talya spun the music like nobody had ever spun music before or will again. The Skols handled the Jail n Bail with the same effortless precision they bring to everything, wrangling warrants, timing releases, and whipping the crowd into a magnificent frenzy of generosity and nonsense. The MELD Campus staff were, as always, on fire. Thanks go to Ashe, Heather, Rex, Valencia, Skye, JaMee, Nalla. Add Ultra and Eerie, Fallon & crew, Kehlan, Andy, Journey, Luna, Auric, Gnome, Chevy, Sio, crap, I do not remember everyone, I am sorry, and so many other great supporters. Add MELD ambassadors and volunteers who showed up and gave everything. Throw all the guests on top or bottom, depending entirely on preference.

We danced. We laughed. We talked considerable amounts of trash. We looked absolutely gorgeous doing all of it. We raised money for Relay for Life, because at the end of the absurd, beautiful, chaotic day, that is what it was all for. We sold tickets to the MELD Kink Convention coming in September. We did approximately seventeen million other things I cannot fully account for because the timeline got a little loose somewhere between the examinations and the cage.